Rookie
by Yanks302021
Summary: Watch Jamie explore raising Jackson while experiencing his rookie year. Disclaimer I do not own blue bloods
1. Chapter 1

Jamie stood outside the familiar door of his dad's house taking a deep breath. His blue eyes fell upon the baby boy fast asleep in the carrier. "This is it buddy, ready to meet everyone?"

It was Sunday at five which meant all the Reagans gathered around the table for family dinner after going to church, a tradition started by Jamie's great grandfather so the family could see each other once a week.

Jamie sighed nervously at introducing the newest addition to everyone, scared of their reaction, but mostly of their faces when he tells them the other news.

"Anyone home," Jamie asked after finally gathering enough courage to push the door open.

He was met with silence probably shock as none of the Reagans were expecting him thinking he was still in Paris with his wife t Sydney.

A minute later Frank appeared in the door volunteering to check himself, his eyes widening seeing his youngest son

"Jamie, what a nice surprise son. We were just sitting down to dinner." Frank moved closer embracing him, his eyes falling downward finally seeing the carrier Jamie was holding.

"Good to see you too dad, is everyone here?"

Frank looked down again at the carrier his son held making sure he wasn't seeing things, sure enough spotting a sleeping baby boy inside who resembled Jamie when he was a baby. Jamie didn't seem to notice his father's surprised expression as he continued into the dinning room to see everyone.

Henry grinned happy to see his grandson again after Jamie moved to Paris with Sydney. Jack, Sean and Niki jumped out their seats and went to hug their uncle all at once while Erin stared in shock. Danny, continued eating giving his baby brother a simple head nod greeting.

"Uncle Jamie why are you carrying a baby around," Sean asked innocently looking up at him turning everyone's attention back to Jamie.

"Well buddy it's because I wanted you to meet your new cousin Jackson."

Niki knelt down quietly taking in the baby breathless at how round his little face was and how his cheeks puffed out. One little hand wrapped around the blanket that Jamie lay to keep him warm.

Danny, who just took a bite of chicken coughed hearing Jamie telling his sons to meet their new cousin. With tears in his eyes Danny managed to cough out "cousin that means?"

Frank returned with a setting for Jamie allowing him to sit with them feeling everyone should be sitting down when Jamie explained. Jamie set the carrier carefully on a chair behind chair in case Jackson woke up sighing ready to explain.

"Jackson is a month old Syd found out she was pregnant before we left. After she had Jackson she seemed fine but a few days ago she said she couldn't do it anymore and was leaving us. I thought it was the post pregnancy depression but Syd really did leave us so I came back. "

Danny responded with a narrowing of his eyes a tell he wasn't happy with Sydney breaking his little brother's heart or leaving them. Even Erin shook her head disappointed in hearing Sydney left them knowing it must be eating away at Jamie.

"I'm sorry Jamie, but better for you then," Henry encouraged with a raise of his glass supportively.

"You're more than welcome to stay with us for as long as you need son," frank agreed softly.

Jamie smiled knowing as long as there were Reagans close by he would be okay. "I have to get pull ups and formulas, would you mind watching him? He usually sleeps and I won't be long."

"Of course, between all of us he'll be fine," frank chuckled at the eagerness in Linda's and Erin's eyes at having a baby in the house again. Niki slid so far forward she would fall off the chair if the table wasn't there.

Laughter filled the room as the Reagan dinner table was full again exchanging teases mostly between Danny and Erin.

After dinner Jamie drove to the local store for supplies over stocking up on diapers, formula, extra clothes, and any other items he thought Jackson would need until they could find an apartment of their own. He purchased a car seat to take Jackson for rides to doctor appointment and shopping.

A half hour later, Jamie exited the store struggling to find his car keys while balancing the eight bags in his hand. Just as his finger gripped the cold metal a bag slipped out of his grasp onto the sidewalk.

"Here you go sir."

In his struggle Jamie noticed the petite blond officer picking up his fallen bag from the ground, holding it until he got settled. He managed to grab the keys and unlocked the doors freeing his hands. He smiled taking the bag catching her deep blue eyes watching him carefully.

"Thank you," he said softly.

Jamie waited until someone she walked off a bit to place the bag in the back with the others before closing the door and driving back home smiling big.


	2. Chapter 2

Jamie returned to find everyone still at the house surrounding Jackson with variations of coos and aahs. "Don't mind me anyone I'm good," he announced, carrying the bags up to his old room where they would be staying.

When he turned to go grab more Jamie found Danny behind him already carrying more bags. "Thanks Danny." Jamie took the bags into a corner of the room until he organized their living space.

"No worries kid, so what are you planning on doing now? "

Jamie sighed debating with himself the whole trip home what his next course of action should be. He could continue practicing law having earned a law degree from Harvard but after Sydney the appeal started to fade. The second option was to become a cop graduating from the academy just before moving.

"I might go back to the NYPD, that's the option I've been leaning towards. I called them already to discuss my options and actually they should be calling me back soon."

"if that's really want you want kid, you know we're going to worry about you though being out there. Hey, once a week let's meet at the range then have a drink?"

Jamie grinned as Danny threw an arm around his neck happy to be back home. Things had been rocky between him and Danny but seeing his brother step up made Jamie feel good.

Tomorrow morrow he'd get assigned a house and training officer to start a new career but tonight Jamie decided to enjoy being back with his family.

The following morning Jamie stirred to the obnoxious ringing of his cell phone on the bedside table next to his bed. Still half asleep, Jamie answered it quickly not wanting to wake Jackson up. "Hello?"

"Jamison Reagan, this is SGT Renzulli from the 12th, informing you that you have been assigned to our house. The CO wants you to report forthwith for your first tour, understand?"

"Yes sir thank you." Jamie hung up stretching his tired muscles fighting the urge to roll over and go back to bed. Giving one last stretch Jamie checked on Jackson, still fast asleep despite the noise taking a quick shower before going to the kitchen.

Frank and Henry looked up hearing footsteps shuffling smiling. "Morning there's coffee in the pot. Is Jackson still sleeping," Henry asked with disappointment.

"Yea actually can you watch him pop? I was called in for my first tour today at the 12th from Sgt Renzulli."

Frank grinned glad Jamie was assigned the 12th as both of his brother's started there too as new boots. Henry agrees happily to watch his youngest great grandson, waiting until Jamie left to eye his own son. "Did you know Jamie was getting assigned to the 12th like Danny and Joe?"

"of course not pop, see you later." Leaving his unfinished coffee on the table, Frank made a hurried escape out the back door leaving Henry alone to shake his head in amusement.

Arriving at the 12th early Jamie stood outside raring at the building a rattle of nerves on his first day. Taking a deep breath Jamie followed other officers up the steps inside looking around the large room.

"Can I help you kid are you lost?"

Jamie turned towards the man in a white decorated captain's shirt snapping to attention. "No sir I'm Jamie Reagan, it's my first day."

The captain gave the new boot a once over barely reacting to the shared name Reagan, same as their police commissioner. "Go down that hall past the double doors, Sgt Renzulli's office is the second door he's expecting you."

Thanking him, Jamie followed the Captain's directions finding an open door occupied Sgt Anthony Renzulli , a 12 year veteran. Jamie knocked first, following protocol to introduce himself to a higher ranking officer.

"As you were kid no need for that here. You must be Jamie Reagan the PC's youngest. I'm Sgt Renzulli I was your brother Joe's training officer when he was a new boot."

Jamie nodded surprised to meet the officer who trained his brother, so many questions surfacing but now was not the time to ask. "I have your locker assignment here and when your ready you'll be introduced to your field training officer who unfortunately isn't me."

Renzulli showed Jamie the locker room leaving him to change into the new uniform. While folding his collar Jamie sighed excited and nervous at the same time he didn't see other officers behind him.

"Hey is this your first day?"

Jamie laughed to himself wondering if it was that obvious he was the new rookie, turning to find a group of four already dressed officers standing behind him. One around Jamie's height with brown hair stepped forward first extending a hand.

"Randy Cutter, this is Reynolds, Rhgetti and Nevins."

Jamie accepted the handshake, giving each officer a greeting nod as they were introduced. "Jamie Reagan."

Two of the men Nevins and Reynolds exchanged glances hearing the last name. "Reagan, any relation to our commissioner?"

"He's my father actually," Jamie admitted, closing his locker and following them back into the hall.

"Well welcome to the 12th," they each patted Jamie's back splitting up to start tour leaving Jamie to return to Renzulli's officer for his training officer.

Jamie followed Renzulli to a large conference room for roll call listening intently. Towards the end Renzulli turned the attention to Jamie smiling. "Let's welcome our newest cop Jamie Reagan. All right hit the streets, Janko Reagan come talk to me."

Making his way around other officers towards Sgt, Jamie looked over at the second officer surprised to see the short blond officer he met on the avenue.

"Janko this is officer Reagan, Reagan meet your training officer. "

The officers turned to face each other exchanging smiles in greeting. "Hey again you get home okay,"

"yea thanks again, so uh guess we're riding together."

Eddie led him out of the precinct to an awaiting RMP, getting in the front driver's seat. "So you really the commissioner's son?"

"yea his youngest but he doesn't give us any special treatment."

Keeping her eyes on the road Eddie headed uptown to their assigned location by Washington Square Park hoping for a quiet day. "I was gonna say must be nice to have your dad as your boss too."

Jamie shrugged not really thinking of his dad as the big boss.

"12 Edward be advised you have a possible 10-10 man with a gun in Washington Square Park white male, 6'0 wearing a gray suit."

Keeping one hand on the wheel Eddie used the other to confirm they were responding. "Follow my lead okay," she advised hoping to calm the rookie's nerves seeing nervousness in his eyes.

Eddie got out leading Jamie into the popular park crowded with parents giving their young toddlers time to play in the playground. Faculty and staff from nearby NYU occupied benches taking a break from classes no one seemed to be worried about a man with a gun.

"this way," Eddie mumbled nodding to a man hurrying away in a gray suit. Eddie followed close behind relaxing when he hugged a young woman showing no evidence of having a weapon. Looking behind her for the rookie, Eddie frowned not seeing him.

Jamie started following Eddie losing her when a crowd cut him off. Sighing he started around spotting a man in a gray suit cursing behind him. "Fck you piece of shit."

Jamie's heart heart pounded slowly approaching trying to get Eddie on the radio. "Sir please take your hands out of your pocket."

The man faced Jamie slowly pulling his hands out pointing a gun at Jamie.

"drop the gun now put it down," Jamie ordered trying to keep his voice even and firm.

"Hey put it down and get on your knees," Eddie joined in, rushing over to help Jamie gun ready as they were trained.

The man glanced at the second cop using the noticeable difference in their badges and posture to guess which of them was a rookie. With a confident smirk the man raised his gun towards Eddie knowing she wouldn't shoot right away whereas the rookie was already on edge by his shaking hands.

"Don't do it," Jamie yelled, firing two shots knocking the man backwards hiring his chest. Lowering his weapon slowly, wide eyed in shock Jamie took a deep breath joining Eddie to check the perp.

Eddie got to the man using her foot to kick the gun away before kneeling beside him. Holding her own gun in one hand Eddie pressed a hand against his throat shaking her head not feeling a pulse.

"He's gone I'll call it in."

Jamie knelt beside the body staring at the man in shock that he just killed someone. Taking off his hat Jamie brushed his hair back with a shaking hand. He heard Eddie's voice a million miles away, incoherent like he was underwater.

"You okay Reagan?"

When Jamie didn't answer Eddie moved closer observing him staring into space not answering her and his whole body shaking. "Central this is 12 David requesting a supervisor for a cop related incident and another bus to treat shock."


	3. Chapter 3

Sirens wailed signaling the approaching police cars and ambulance only minutes after Eddie called it in. Renzulli strolled over to the new partners Eddie with her hand on Jamie's shoulder supportively while the rookie continued shaking.

"Hey how's he doing?"

Eddie's blue eyes raised to her boss filled with concern over the state of her partner. "First day on the job and he kills a guy how would you be doing?"

Ignoring the sarcasm in her voice Renzulli moved closer to the kid feeling bad having been in his position. "Hey how you holding up kid?"

Jamie gave a small shake of head letting Renzulli know he wasn't doing okay. "Look kid we've all been where you are okay. Yea it's a shock but it'll be okay. IAB is looking into it but if the shooting was justified you'll get off."

"He was about to shoot my partner so I didn't have a choice," Jamie managed to explain.

Eddie nodded her head backing up his story only then realizing he saved her life. "Perp pointed at me Sgt. He saved my life and I'll testify to that"

"Okay well thing is it's under investigation so we can't talk about it. They'll confiscate your weapon run ballistics and if everything comes out clean you'll be given it back. Until then go to the hospital and get checked out for trauma. Do you want me to call Danny to take you?"

"I'll take him if that's okay Sgt," offered Eddie figuring it's the least she could do for saving her life.

Renzulli eyed her but nodded his okay turning to the scene getting back to work hoping Eddie could help her partner through this.

Eddie drove Jamie to the nearest hospital waiting while he was checked out by a doctor. When he came out smiling Eddie walked back to her car with him quietly.

"Hey thanks for saving my life and having my back today," she said quietly. She understood where he was coming from the unknown drove you crazy.

Jamie looked up at her nodding feeling he did nothing more then kill a man who was about to kill his partner. "I'm would you be up be coming over? I can order a pizza or something I just don't feel like being alone."

Eddie studied him for a second recognizing the reality starting to hit him. "Yea of course I love pizza if my grandfather didn't cook ."

With Jamie's directions Eddie drove back to his childhood house. Jamie ordered a pie for joining her on the couch with two beers.

"Thanks so tell me honestly how are you doing with all this? Because when it happened to me I was a mess," Eddie offered a smile.

Jamie shrugged popping off the top of his beer and downed half in one drink. "I knew we might have to shoot someone in our job but.."

"It's different when you actually do it yea I get it. You did out of self defense otherwise he might have shot me, it was a good shoot. I've been in your position before perp pointed a gun at my partner I shot the guy without thinking. Might have been on the job maybe a month then so I felt the anxiety, the denial, guilt that you feel now. " Jamie met her big blue eyes his full of the exact symptoms Eddie listed. "How'd you get through it?"

"My partner at the time the same one who I saved helped me through it. Sgt Renzulli goofs around a lot but he's there for things like this." Eddie smiled remembering the conversations between them, Renzulli's always calm assurance.

Jamie shook his head seeing it differently, he'd just killed a man. "I should have disarmed him or tried to coax him out of it. Maybe if I tried harder and waited he wouldn't be dead."

"Hey, it was a good shoot there was nothing else you could have do. He pointed the weapon at your partner and you didn't know his intention. IAB will clear you and we'll be back out together."

Their conversation was interrupted by the pizza arriving as Jamie went to retrieve. After paying the delivery guy Jamie brought the steaming box back to where Eddie waited with plates. The two fell quiet busily eating their dinner.

With the pizza polished off the partners settled in to watch tv for a bit until Eddie checked the time not realizing how late it was. "Do you want me to call your dad or brother to come over?"

Jamie gave a shake of his head, his family meant well but he didn't want them right now, especially not Danny. There was only one person who could help him through this.

"Would you mind staying here tonight? "

Jamie looked up quickly realizing how that came out. "No I don't mean like that but you're the only person who can help me right now and I guess I need you."

His blue eyes met hers in them reflecting the fear, guilt and fear he felt.

Eddie moved closer putting an at around his shoulders for a hug while gently caressing his arm with her fingers.

"I'm not going anywhere."


	4. Chapter 4

Eddie stayed with Jamie holding him throughout the night while he battled the emerging emotions as reality began to hit. He eventually fell asleep in Eddie's arms on the couch around one only to be woken up an hour later gasping at the nightmare of a gun going off.

Feeling him moving woke Eddie up looking over to check on him sighing finding him once again awake. "It's okay c'mere." She opened her arms allowing him to rest against her seeing the shock in his wide blue eyes. Eddie felt bad for him knowing how much of a shock it must be having to kill someone not even a month in, plus Jamie was one of the good guys, sweet and sensitive.

Shaking her head she admonished herself for thinking like that. I'm his work partner and his training officer we can't. Still looking down feeling him in her arms made it seem okay.

With a gentle hand Eddie moved her arm letting it rest underneath his left arm on his stomach.

"It helps if you talk about it out loud you know. That's what the shrink has us do anyone after a shooting fatal or not."

"Every time I close my eyes I see that guy and a gun going off.."

As Jamie let what was going through his mind out Eddie listened quietly letting her hand take his and rubbing a line over his knuckles down his hand soothingly. "What if I gave him another option or waited may be he wouldn't have shot," Jamie went on with his thoughts.

"You couldn't have known that though you reacted appropriately that's why he pointed it at me and not you. You saved my life Jamie and I'm thankful for that. Think about it this way, what If you did hesitate and he ended up shooting me. You would have felt worse having your partner shot then some creep. It was a good shoot trust me."

Jamie sighed feeling her gentle touch soothing as he lay against her finally exhausted enough to fall back asleep. Smiling Eddie looked down hearing his breathing slow down as he seemed to be sleeping peacefully.

Yawning herself Eddie slowly lay back stretching across the couch while repositioning Jamie to lay over her with his head resting on her shoulder. Eddie moved her arms back around his waist slowly wondering if she should help him get more comfortable.

"I can walk you know," Jamie whispered into her ear with a warm breath.

"I didn't want to wake you since you'll need sleep. C'mon let's get you to bed." Eddie shook her head at him waiting until Jamie got up to accept the help up following him into the bedroom.

Jamie started stripping his shirt off as they walked into the bedroom and pants collapsing into the bed while Eddie pulled the blankets down for him. "Try and get some sleep okay I'm right out here if you need.

"Wait, can you stay just a bit until I fall asleep?" Jamie opened his eyes to look up at her feeling more relaxed with her by his side. Eddie hesitated but nodded lying on the bed beside him surprised as he went back into her arms, head resting on her shoulder with an arm around her waist. Smiling slightly, Eddie hugged him closer letting her hands roam up and down his back in small motions soothingly closing her own eyes.

Eddie felt herself relaxing intending to just stay until he fell asleep before moving back to the couch keeping their partnership boundaries but fell asleep before she could move.

Jamie woke up early the next morning this time not plagued by a recurring nightmare but after having a good night's sleep. He looked up feeling the warm body beside him, smiling seeing Eddie still there fast asleep.

Not ready to move away yet totally comfortable in the warmth of her arms, Jamie repositioned his head on a pillow returning the favor by wrapping his arms around her. Eddie stirred at the movement still in a sleep filled state moving her head onto his chest with her hand on her stomach

It took a minute for Eddie to wake up finally realizing where she was and why it was so warm and comfortable. Eddie moved back staring at him wide eyed with an apologetic look. "I'm sorry Jamie I never meant to I fell asleep. You know we're still partners and I'm your training officer so we can't."

Jamie couldn't help but laugh at her rant reaching over to put a hand on her arm. "Hey take a breath okay first of all no one's here besides us so no one will know and second we didn't do anything. "

Eddie took several deep breaths smiling in recognition of what a good sleep she got, probably better than anytime she could remember and no they hadn't done anything. Sighing she relented resting on his chest again with her head up watching him. "Sorry just I don't want you to think.."

"No I actually slept better then I probably ever have. I know we're partners but it felt," Jamie couldn't quite place the right word.

"Yeah I know what you mean," Eddie added knowing exactly how he felt. "Still, we're partners it's against the guidebook and your dad is PC."

Jamie sighed knowing she was right, ran a gentle hand down her arm sending shivers through her body. "My dad doesn't have to know in fact no one in the department has to know except us. Once I finish probation we can ask for new partners and come out."

"Come out huh?" Eddie cocked a teasing eyebrow at him laughing at his choice of words.

"You know what I mean," Jamie said, a smirk appearing on his face as he ran his hands down her side tickling her for revenge causing Eddie to squirm and giggle.

"Okay Harvard if you say so I dunno I guess no one will find out unless your family comes dropping by," Eddie said once Jamie stopped and she was able to relay in his arms.

Jamie responded with a kiss to her head meeting her deep blue eyes, his voice deep and husky. "They never do, we respect each other's privacy."

Eddie smiled seeing this might actually work traced a hand on his chest before looking up to meet his eyes again. Jamie's expression softened seeing her eyes twinkling framed by her curly blond hair and soft lips. He returned the smile slowly moving closer letting their lips press together testing the waters out.

Their hands entangled as they pressed their bodies together deepening the kiss with their eyes closed. The kiss began soft at first before passion burst with harder kisses coming more frequently.

After sharing their first kiss, Eddie lay back in Jamie's arms closing her eyes relaxing while he held her. Jamie's strong arms hugged her grateful she stuck by him after the incident not feeling so guilty only scared of IAB investigation.

Smiling brightly Jamie pulled the covers around them wanting more time to just relax so he closed his eyes and held her tight. They were both barely asleep when the apartment door opened followed by moving around.

Both cops instantly shot up reaching for their weapons slowly climbing out of bed. Eddie met Jamie's eyes giving him a nod as they proceeded towards the kitchen while Danny came into the bedroom.


	5. Chapter 5

That Sunday while Eddie ran some errands Jamie brought Drew to Sunday dinner at his father's house. He carried the baby inside smiling at his sister and sister in law who fussed over the baby.

While the women were occupied Danny figured it was a great time to check on his little brother bringing a beer with him. "Hey kid how's it going?"

"Good Danny," Jamie kept his eyes on Drew as the ladies tickled him until he laughed.

Danny moved his head to meet his brother's eyes letting him know that wasn't all he wanted to ask. "So how's Eddie?"

Jamie grabbed his brother's arm pulling him into the hallway where they were less likely to be heard by anyone, especially by their father. "Dad's in the next room and he still doesn't know. She held Drew last night it was great."

Danny lifted his beer taking a swig of beer before answering with a laughing shake of his head. "Be careful kid okay, let's go to dinner."

The family gathered around the dinning room table saying grace before passing food around. As he scooped potatoes into his own plate Frank looked down the table at his youngest son. "How's work been Jamie?"

"It's good," Jamie answered shortly, keeping his eyes down on his plate.

Erin and Frank exchanged worried glances raising an eyebrow sensing Jamie wasn't telling the whole truth. "How's Eddie doing," Erin asked turning her attention back to her brother. Through her peripheral vision Erin caught the snicker from Danny with a mouthful of food.

Jamie took a small bite of meat giving his brother a warning look. "She's good," he answered with a slight shrug.

"Officer Janko is a good officer, I can't imagine anyone else for Jamie's TO except of course, Renzulli," Frank spoke up. "Have you told your partner about the little one?"

"Yeah, but Eddie doesn't seem to be into babies," Jamie replied. "Neither did his mom it turns out. But that's okay, I think he'll grow on Eddie and I think we'll be great friends."

Henry gave a huff at the mention of Jackson's mother even when her name wasn't mentioned. He wasn't a big fan of anyone who hurt his family.

Jamie turned back to his dinner and ate listening to the political and civil arguments around the table thinking of his pretty partner and how she fit in his arms.

When dinner finished, Jamie didn't go home heading to Eddie's apartment with little Drew in his arms instead. The boy was fussing and kicking his blanket off. "We missed you."

"Hey, what are you doing keeping the baby out so late," Eddie admonished moving aside to let them in. Jackson scrunched up his nose wailing to let them know he still wasn't happy and once again kicked the blanket off.

Jamie removed his son from the car seat into his protective arms rocking him gently hoping to sooth the irritated boy but Jackson's wails only grew . Eddie frowned at the boy's fussing a good set of lungs for someone so little. "Is he okay," Eddie asked.

"Yea can you take him I have to make him a bottle?" Jamie didn't wait for an answer before passing him over into Eddie's nervous arms allowing Jamie to make him a bottle.

Eddie cradled Jackson tightly against her chest barely moving the way Jamie showed her. She slowly started towards the couch lowering herself down feeling more comfortable. "It's okay Jackson ," Eddie soothed.

Jamie returned with a freshly made bottle taking the empty spot next to her. When Eddie started to hand Jackson back Jamie shook his head and placed the bottle in her hand. While she held Jackson Jamie moved closer and adjusting her hand so less air gets through.

"You got it," he whispered softly smiling at the amazed look on her face while Jackson qdrank thirstily. While Eddie fed Jackson Jamie held his hands arms around her the whole time.

Once Jackson was satisfied and fell back asleep Eddie settled on Jamie's lap arms wrapped around his neck. "Hey beautiful," Jamie laughed while wrapping his arms around her. It was then that he noticed the bruises covering her neck and arm like she's been in a fight.

"Eddie what happened," Jamie asked looking her over angrily sending someone did this to her.

"This guy I knew wanted to talk he forced himself in and when I told him no he had to leave he attacked me. It took everything to get away from him," Eddie admitted her bottom lip quivering.

Jamie pressed her against him protectively while taking deep breaths to control his anger. "No one will hurt you now I promise. Why don't we stay the night and tomorrow you can come by my place. I want a description of the guy so we can find him for what he did to you."

Eddie nodded her head slowly before laying it on Jamie's broad chest feeling safe wrapped in his strong. "Thanks Jamie," she whispered so low Jamie almost didn't hear it.

In response Jamie kissed the top of her head holding her quietly as his mind wandered to this guy who put his hands on his Eddie. Jamie silently reminded himself to talk with Danny about it tomorrow.

Looking down, Jamie smiled at Eddie's still body as she fell asleep in his arms tiredly. Instead of going to sleep himself Jamie laid up a little while longer thinking until exhaustion caught up.


	6. Chapter 6

Eddie slept in Jamie's arms that night clinging tightly to him while he lay awake all night holding her tight. Jamie made her breakfast runny eggs and sausage while she rested bringing it back to her room.

After they both filled up Jamie took out his cell texting Danny to come over and talk to Eddie about the attack the previous night. While they waited Jamie made a personal call to the precinct for a sketch artist to come and make a poster for distribution in every precinct.

Danny arrived a half hour after let in by Jamie. "Thanks for coming Danny some guy got Eddie real good," Jamie explained showing his brother to the living room where Eddie wired to make a statement.

"No problem kid, hey Eddie you okay," Danny asked softening his voice for the fellow cop. Up close Danny and Baez saw the pronounced bruises on her arm, neck and one on the cheek. Jamie returned to the spot beside Eddie to assure her while she toldDanny what happened.

"I'm okay Detective just a few bruises. He was an old friend of mine who I haven't seen in a long time. He wanted to talk but I told him no, he kept insisting. That's when I text Jamie but he forced himself inside and attacked me. In the scuffle I got in a good right hook," Eddie paused to take in a deep breath and gather her emotions.

Danny watched them quietly the way Eddie leaned against Jamie using him a pillow. "I know it's hard Eddie, but your doing the right thing here. We'll find him and make him pay."

Eddie nodded knowing Danny would keep his promise but Eddie couldn't help feel embarrassed she wasn't able to fight him off. Jamie gave her hands a squeeze sensing her hesitation. "You did good Eddie you fought him off and scared him away," Jamie assured in a soft whisper.

"I know Jamie I can't help it though. He was six four or six five with black eyes and he had dark brown hair straight. There was a mark on his neck like a scar here." Eddie pointed to the side of her neck showing them where the scar was located.

The sketch artist stopped by working with Eddie until they had a sample sketch of the perp which he promised to get out.

"Hang in there Eddie we'll get this guy okay," Danny assured. He gave his little brother a slight nod on his way out leaving the two to get ready for their tour.

Arriving ten minutes before tour started giving Jamie and Eddie enough time to make coffee in the kitchen before splitting up to change. Jamie gave Eddie a small smirk about to start in when Renzulli called him from behind.

"Hey Harvard got word the CO is looking for guys to work an undercover assignment and I put your name down. Don't bother changing just meet me where we do roll call I'll explain the assignment," explained Renzulli proud to see the kid expanding.

"Thanks Sergeant." Jamie looked back where the women lockers were located wanting to tell Eddie before the meeting but Renzulli ushered him into a large room with nine other officers.

Renzulli stood up in front of the podium and cleared his throat for their attention. "Okay you all were brought here to work an undercover assignment. Each of you will be paired off and work a bar looking for the selling or buying of underage drinking and

Narcotics. Reagan your working with Atwater."

Jamie turned to look at the curly black haired cop taking notes on his right.

Renzulli ended the meeting allowing his officers to start towards their locations. Atwater took a spot near the back wall while Jamie made a beeline for the bar ordering a beer. A shorter man looked up from the stool to Jamie's left continuing to hold his drink in one hand.

"Hey don't I know you," the guy asked looking Jamie over.

"No man don't think so," Jamie answered with a shrug of his shoulders not recognizing the guy.

Still holding the drink bringing it up to mouth before eyeing Jamie again. "I know you Noble Sanfino," the guy insisted extending a hand out to shake.

Jamie didn't know whether to find this guy amusing or annoying so he just smiled accepting the hand shake. "Jimmy Riordin but sorry man I don't know you."

Noble shook his head giving Jamie one more determined look before starting towards the back table. Shaking his own head Jamie turned back to the bar taking a quick sip out of his beer enjoying a calm night.

For the next two nights Jamie returned to the bar sitting on the same stool and drinking the same beer. On the second night Noble slowly started towards the bar high off a new drug he just tried.

Noble had barely reached the stool when he stumbled forward missing hitting his head against the bar. "Noble you okay, hey call 9-1-1," Jamie reached down to help him up.

"Get him out we don't call for OD," the bartender snarled back.

Sighing Jamie lifted Noble up carrying him outside to an empty table allowing him to pull his cell out and call 9-1-1 himself. While waiting for the ambulance Jamie kept Noble upright taking off when the medics arrived minutes

Forty five minutes later due to some congestion Jamie pushed open his apartment door shrugging off the jacket he wore. Hearing his keys Eddie walked over from the couch where she tried staying up to wait for him already changed into her night wear.

"How'd it go today," Eddie asked wrapping an arm around his waist and leaned up to kiss him. Smiling himself Jamie hugged her close returning the kiss then lead her to the couch pulling her onto his lap.

"It was okay nothing out of the ordinary. Sorry you got stuck writing tickets but I did miss you," Jamie said. He placed a kiss on her cheek nuzzling her neck until she turned in his arms tiredly meeting his lips quickly.

Looking up into his blue gray eyes Eddie took his hand to get up so they could cuddle in bed. Jamie scooped Eddie in his arms instead wedding style laying her gently on the bed before climbing in after her cuddling her close trying to get some sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Over the next few weeks Jamie continued going undercover part time trying to get close with Noble and his family working with Tesla a made guy in the Sanfino family. Sanfino unfortunately took an immediate dislike to Jamie and had no problems showing it.

While Jamie worked the phones Tesla sat on his desk staring daggers through Jamie the entire time. "Yes I understand thank you," Jamie said hanging up the phone and looking up at Tesla.

"What are you looking at me for get back to work while I have a cigarette." With one fleeting glare Tesla stepped outside giving Jamie enough time to copy the necessary files to bust Tesla and allow him back on the street.

After one quick look scan of the room to make sure no one was watching Jamie inserted the USB drive holding the phone to his ear pretending to be working. On the screen a light green box appeared showing the slow progress.

Tesla returned around halfway, stopping to check on another worker allowing Jamie to place a hand over the drive hiding it. His blue eyes studied the box urging it to go faster until complete appeared on the screen.

Quickly averting his eyes Jamie checked Tesla's position before pocketing the drive in time for Teala to return. "What are you doing," Tesla demanded.

"Nothing," Jamie quickly checked his call list dialing the next number with Tesla standing over him.

Five couldn't come fast enough for Jamie who bolted out of the place holding a water bottle hoping what he got was enough to incriminate them and allow him to work the streets again. Unfortunately for Jamie his plan didn't work out as Teala and a friend followed him out to the lot.

"Hey wait up," Tesla called from behind, hurrying to catch Jamie before he reached his car. Thinking quick Jamie reached into his front pocket throwing the drive into his mouth swallowing it with a gulp of water.

"I have to go," Jamie called over his shoulder continuing to walk until Tesla skidded in front blocking his path.

With narrow eyes Tesla put a hand on Jamie's chest stopping him in his tracks. "Hold on you took something that didn't belong to you and I want it back."

"Your full of shit." Jamie shook his head starting around him but Tesla grabbed Jamie's arm shoving him onto the car hood.

Grinning with authority Tesla began to search Jamie for papers he might have ripped off. In response Jamie brought his elbow up into Tesla's chest knocking the wind out of him.

Running on instinct and survival Jamie threw a right hook hitting Tesla in the head. The second worker approached in defense of his boss knocking Jamie on the side of the head holding him while Tesla mercilessly threw punches at Jamie's face and ribs until Jamie collapsed on the ground spitting up blood.

"That'll teach you," Tesla taunted, leading the man laying bloodied on the ground to head back inside.

Jamie lay on the ground sitting up only when hearing his name. Noble's sister Bianca rushed to his side gasping at the bloodied man. "Are you okay? You need to see a doctor Jimmy, who did this?"

"Tesla and I'm fine." Jamie grimaced slowly getting back to his feet holding his ribs knowing his identity would be blown if she took him to a hospital.

"No your not," Bianca insisted taking his arm surprised when he pulled her close allowing them to look in each other's eyes despite Jamie's turning red and already starting to swell. "Bye Bianca," he whispered getting his car heading towards the precinct.

Jamie dropped off the drive without saying much to the Lieutenant his eye almost completely swollen shut. "They did this to you? Go get checked out I'll call the commissioner, hey you did really good kid."

Answering with a simple nod Jamie started towards Brooklyn stopping at his father's house first to relieve Henry of his son.

"Oh my god Jamie what happened," Henry asked in shock at the state of his youngest grandson's mangled fa even.

"Part of the job thanks for watching him pops I really appreciate it," Jamie told him taking Jackson wanting nothing more then to just go home and lay down.

Using his own keys Jamie pushed open the door wincing at the added weight of his son's carrier inside, getting as far as the kitchen counter before he had to stop. "You're heavy buddy," Jamie told Jackson wincing as he moved his ribs.

"Jamie?"

Jamie froze forgetting about having Eddie see him like this making a slow turn around not even bother to smile. Eddie gasped rushing to him fussing at his now fully swollen face, his one eye completely red. Blood from his nose dried underneath splattered over his jacket.

"Oh my god Jamie what the hell happened? " Eddie quickly ushered him to the couch bringing Jackson, disappearing briefly to gather supplies needing to tend to him.

With a low tisk sound Eddie first gently cleaned the dried blood off his face with gentle movements. She then looked him over assessing where else he needed her attention. "What else hurts?"

"My ribs," Jamie admitted knowing it was better to be honest with her.

Eddie retrieved two ice packs holding one over his cheek gently meeting his eyes softly with worry. "keep it on it'll stop the swelling. Can you take your shirt off or do you need help?"

Not waiting for an answer Eddie leaned over him lifting up his shirt over his head meeting his eyes again worried seeing him hurt. She carefully placed the second ice pack on his swollen ribs frowning when he squirmed at the coldness.

"C'mere it'll help," Eddie said softly sitting on his lap holding the ice pack steady distracting him from the cold with gentle soothing runs through his hair. Suddenly distracted Jamie smiled pulling her against him allowing her to nurse him.


	8. Chapter 8

While recovering from his injury Jamie was placed on injury leave forcing him to stay home. Being cooped up usually bothered Jamie but Eddie spent as much time with him around tours doing everything to nurse him back to health.

Several weeks after the attack thanks to Eddie taking good care of him Jamie scheduled a doctor appointment to get clearance so he could return to work.

The morning of his appointment Jamie woke up to the bed moving followed by an empty feelings in his arms. He opened his eyes to see Eddie rushing to the bathroom for the third morning that week.

Throwing back the covers Jamie followed kneeling on the floor to hold her hair while she got sick. "This is the fourth time you've gotten sick Eddie, you have no appetite which is not like you. come with me to see the doctor," Jamie said softly.

Eddie waited until the latest sickness passed slowly looking at him her mind wandering to when she first started getting sick. It took a minute for her memory to clear back to the weekend celebrating Jamie feeling better. They spent the night watching movies with Jackson until the baby fell asleep.

The evening continued with the movie, a gentle kiss, a caress that ended with a night in the bedroom.

"Jamie this weekend what If I'm.." Eddie couldn't finish the sentence scared to say it aloud.

Jamie cupped her face and kissed her forehead assuringly. "If you are we'll handle it, come back to bed babe I'm going to call the doctor."

With his help Eddie got back to bed waiting while Jamie made an appointment for her too not wanting to admit he was scared. Jackson was still very young would they be able to handle too young kids? How would his family react not knowing about Eddie yet.

Jamie got an appointment with him driving them around two forces to park around the corner. Holding hands Jamie led her with an assuring smile offering her a hug before they went inside unaware two reporters watched from across the street.

The wait to be seen wasn't long before they knew they followed a nurse to the room joined by a doctor shortly after. "So what can I do for you Eddie," she asked hike checking Jamie's rubs happy with his recovery.

"I haven't been feeling well lately, getting sick in the morning, not much of an appetite, and I've been kind of dizzy," Eddie admitted ignoring the surprised look Jamie gave.

"Okay we'll find out what's going on. I'm going to give you a cup to pee in so we can take a grin sample and I'll run some tests." The doctor bustled around running tests on Eddie who remained quiet with a held breath.

After a long half hour of poking Eddie the doctor checked his computer typing quickly before he turned to the anxious pair. "Okay I should have the results within a few days so I'll be in touch."

Jamie sighed wishing they'd found out that day but kept quiet walking out with Eddie child ing hands. They barely stepped onto the sidewalk when Jamie's cell rang. With one hand he fished it from his pocket answering the call seeing it was his dad.

"Hey dad what's up?"

Eddie gave a raised eyebrow wondering why the commissioner was calling figuring it wasn't just to say hi. "Officer Reagan, I need you to come into my office forthwith with your partner."

Jamie sighed again knowing when his dad used their work status it probably wasn't good. "Yes sir, we'll be right there." He ended the call explaining to Eddie what his father said walking back to the car to drive into Manhattan.

As they stepped off the elevator Eddie gulped despite the friendly look Baker gave spotting them. She announced them with one more assuring look before going back to her desk. Garret and Gornley turned to them apologetically for what was about t happen.

"Officer Reagan, officer Janko this won't take long. Not long ago two reporters caught you going into a doctor's office holding hands. You two are both aware partners are not to become romantically involved so I would like an explanation. How long has this relationship been going on?"

"Few months sir," Eddie spoke up first.

Frank purses his lips at her as the senior officer. "You both should have known better but officer Janko you're the senior officer, you should have stopped it. I'm very disappointed in both of you. "

"We're both aware of the rules sir but we love each other." Jamie smiled at Eddie letting her know they were in this together.

"then you should have went to your CO and asked for new partners you both failed to show responsibility in the situation. I am suspending you both for three weeks and when you return will receive new partners. You put yourselves and in each other in danger, you should have known better," Frank lectured making direct eye contact with his son.

Jamie gave a small shake of his head eyes rounded . "We both knew and we would like to continue its relationship," he pleaded with the paternal side to his father.

Frank turned his head to Jamie hands folded with a serious look on his tired face. "That is not my business but I would highly discourage it as you were not forthcoming from the start."

"That's not your business I'm trying to appeal as your son not just an Nypd officer," Jamie pleaded temper rising.

"You are also an NYPD police officer under my command so I would advise you to stop talking," Frank warned.

Trying to intervene before Jamie said something he would later regret Eddie squeezed Jamie's hand speaking up. "We will both take our punishment sir but with all due respect as his father I love Jamie and want to keep seeing him sir."

"If you really loved him officer Janko you'd have stopped the relationship before it got to this. If you want to keep him seeing him that's your choice but I won't approve," frank shook his head and leaned against the back of the chair.

"if you won't approve then we won't work for you cmon Eddie." Jamie looped an arm around her leading her out ignoring the exchange between Garret and Gornley.


	9. Chapter 9

After fight with his father and now on suspension Jamie and Eddie spent their time with Jackson and each other avoiding phone calls from the family. While watching Jackson who recently turned four months make happy faces, they discussed options for the future.

"Jamie I really don't want to leave the department but what other choices do we have," Eddie asked tickling Jackson's stomach.

Sighing in response Jamie smiled at his boy kicking his legs happily. "We could transfer get a job in jersey or Long Island. I've been looking at houses out there too they're nice, we could probably find something in our price range."

Eddie took a minute to think it over before adding her opinion. "Def Long Island the drive into the city is awful. Let me see what you've found so far?" She scotched closer resting her head on his arm while he booted up his laptop to the saved page scrolling through houses.

"Why were you looking into five bedrooms is someone else moving in with us," Eddie looked up with a raised eyebrow.

"No one for us, Jackson and who knows if we start a family they'll have their own room." Jamie gave a casual shrug of his shoulders looking back at the picture.

Eddie laughed at how he brought their raising a family up in the conversation. "You'd have more kids?"

Jamie wrapped an arm around her pulling her against him allowing him to kiss the top of her head and moved down kissing her neck. "With you sure, I'd actually like a daughter too may be two of each?"

"Whoa easy Romeo who'd be carrying those kids not you. " Eddie closed her eyes melting at his hot breath against her neck. "Damnit you know how to get me, we'll see let's get the jobs first."

Grinning in defeat Jamie pulled up the Long Island police department giving it a look over quickly before applying for both of them. "We should hear back soon."

He closed the laptop setting it aside and rewrapped his arms around Eddie cuddling close.

Everything seemed to fall into place for them over the next few weeks, receiving a call from the West Islip police department accepting both into their squad. While waiting for word on the transfer, Jamie and Eddie also home searched settling on a four bedroom house with two bathrooms, a dinning room, full basement and large yard.

Packing took barely any time giving them plenty of time to cuddle on the couch wanting to move into their new home. As Jamie loaded the car Eddie brought Jackson down keeping him entertained with smiles.

"Okay we're ready to go," Jamie announced buckling Jackson's car seat in the back going around to drive. The gps estimated their trip to take over an hour and a half but with no traffic they made it an hour fifteen minutes.

Pulling up into the driveway Jamie got Jackson out before going around to place an arm around Eddie's shoulders. "Welcome home babe."

"Ssh," Eddie whispered to Jamie as he came into the bedroom years after they'd moved. "Beth just went down. She is so colicky Jamie, I don't know what to do with myself. The boys were angels and Jackson was such a big help."

Jamie leaned over and kissed Eddie's cheek pulling her in for a hug. "Let me look in on the boys, I'll stay up for the next bottle. You get some sleep. How's your tummy?"

Beth had been a c-section and Eddie was still in the recovery period.

"Still really upset, I've tried tea, ginger ale.." Eddie trailed off with a sigh in frustration at the stomach problems along with a colicky baby and three boys.

Jamie placed a kiss on her lips and rubbed a hand over her irritable stomach before heading out to check on their boys starting with the twins two year old Zack and Alex. He slipped into their room watching them sleep with a smile.

"Love you boys," he whispered, placing a kiss on their heads before heading out to check on Jackson.

Jackson lay on his side, one arm around the teddy bear Jamie bought when he was three . He smiled kissing his head gently. "I love you buddy," he whispered leaving the bedroom door open in case he needed.

When he returned Eddie lay on the bed curled up hit by another attack while Jamie checked on their boys. With a shake of his head Jamie approached the bed gently pulling Eddie on his lap with his arms around her rubbing her stomach.

"Close your eyes babe I'm right here," Jamie soothed continuing to massage her until she fell into a light sleep. He kept his arms around her making small circles under her shirt while she slept fighting to stay awake.

His eyes fluttered open hearing Beth wail checking the time groaning when he saw it was two thirty in the morning.

Gently placing Eddie on the bed Jamie threw his feet over the bed standing up walking towards the crib. He leaned over gently lifting Beth until she lay against his chest. "Shh C'mere baby girl daddy's here, don't be sad," he soothed in a low whisper so not to wake Eddie.

Jamie took Beth downstairs keeping her in his arms while he prepared a bottle. When the bottle boiled Jamie tested it out on his wrist before feeding his daughter walking to the couch.

As Beth drank in between small sobs, Jamie leaned down planting small kisses on her tiny head adoringly. "That's daddy's girl, there you go baby," he encouraged, blue eyes twinkling like diamonds at his baby girl.

After Beth finished, Jamie slowly rocked her in his arms where he promised to protect her. "You are not dating until your thirty five young lady."

In response Beth gave a small wail before drifting off to sleep.

With a broad smile Jamie brought her up to the bedroom and laid her down gently. With Beth fast asleep Jamie slipped under the covers immediately wrapping his arms around Eddie's waist to lay kisses behind her ear.

Eddie turned facing him using his chest as a pillow with her hand roaming down his side. "Go to sleep babe," Jamie whispered kissing her head as he held onto her tightly.

"Jackson wanted me to ask if you'd come to his soccer game next week. He said he's been practicing really hard for you," Eddie whispered in her sleep. She curled her lower body against him wanting to feel his warmth against her.

"I wouldn't miss it babe. I'm off tomorrow so I can take the kids to school while you rest," Jamie said.

Eddie moaned lightly under breath sleep starting to overtake her.

After receiving no response Jamie simply held Eddie in his arms laying up while she slept still amazed at their life with four kids. Work wasn't as busy compared to the big city but it definitely wasn't boring either.

The captain of their precinct recruited them as rookies but offered guidance in their desired direction after a year probation finally allowing Jamie to get promoted.

As happy as Jamie was, every so often he's think of his family paying attention anytime he heard a cop had been shot in case it was Danny. He missed his big sister, grandfather, niece, and nephews.

Lost in his own thoughts Jamie didn't realize Eddie had fallen asleep already breathing lightly on his bare chest. Laughing to himself Jamie pulled the covers around to make sure she was tucked in before curling up on his side so their bodies pressed together.

He held her around the waist closing his own eyes knowing morning was right around the corner and he'd have to be up early to drop the kids off.'

It didn't take long for him to fall into a very light sleep with his mind preoccupied.

Just around quarter after six Jamie's cell played the factory ringtone that came as a default. Jamie stirred slowly reaching for the annoying object on his bed side table still in a deep sleep.

"Reagan," he croaked to the caller , groaning seeing what time it was.

"Jamie?"

Despair and worry could be heard over the phone in his sister's voice catching Jamie's attention.

"Jamie, it's pops he's in the hospital ."


	10. Chapter 10

Jamie froze his mind whirling a million a million thoughts of what could have happened. "Erin is he okay?"

"He's really sick you have to come St Victor's." Erin could barely get the words out still in shock and worry.

"Okay we'll be there." When he hung up Jamie realized Eddie was watching him wide eye.

Jamie threw the covers back getting up slowly. "Pops is in the hospital; he's really bad."

"Ill call the kids school let them know they're not coming." Eddie stood to make the phone calls while Jamie gathered the kids.

Beth looked up at him her eyes crystal blue. Jamie carefully lifted her cradling her against him making sure to support her neck. He placed a kiss on her head taking her downstairs to get the boys.

Jamie arrived with the kids to the hospital in two hours rushing upstairs needing to see his grandpa.

When he entered the room Jamie looked past his father and brother bringing his boys towards the bed.

"Hey pop came soon as I heard." Jamie gently squeezed Henry's hand letting the older man know he was there.

Henry lay with an oxygen mask over his pale face, his eyes closed to looked his age laying in the bed hooked up to machines instead of his usually energetic self.

Unbeknownst to Jamie, Frank and Danny exchanged the same looks watching the two younger boys who looked like carbon copies of Jamie gently touch Henry"s hand.

"How long's it been kid," Danny spoke up breaking the silence.

"Awhile," Jamie answered shortly focused on his grandpa.

Alex turned in his uncle's direction hiding behind Jamie's leg shyly. "Its ok buddy thats your uncle Danny and aunt Erin and grandpa. "

"Hey little buddy, whats your name?" Danny asked with a smile.

In response Alex shook his head hugging Jamie's leg. Jackson stepped out standing between Danny and his brothers while watching his mom in case he had to protect her and his sister.

"That's your uncle Danny buddy, your aunt Erin and your grandfather," Jamie spoke directly to his son's without looking up at anyone. As though that constituted some assurance Jackson relaxed only slightly still keeping in front of his brother's while watching his mom.

Eddie stepped closer giving the Reagans a nod to greet them approaching the bed. Keeping one arm under Beth's neck to support her head Eddie used her free hand to give Henry's hand a gentle squeeze. She winced when the older man took a deep breath sending a whistling noise when he let the breath go.

"I'm going to take the kids outside okay, take your time." Eddie shifted in her toes to kiss him softly ushering the boys outside to the waiting room leaving Jamie with his family.

Jamie kept his attention on Henry wordlessly watching his beloved grandfather sleep. Frank sighed at the elephant in the room clearing his throat.

"He'll be glad you're here Jamie." Jamie finally tore his red brimmed eyes upward nodding in response.

?

Again Frank sighed hating the awkwardness between him and his boys. Sensing the tension Danny decided to intervene. "He's not the only one kid we all missed you. "

"I'm sure you did not sure about the others," Jamie replied looking directly at his father.

"We all did Jamie. It hurt when you left without a word. I understand your still angry son but I'd like to work this out," Frank said gently.

Although he wouldn't admit it, the truth was Jamie missed his family too. Still he had his own family to think about and if they couldn't accept Eddie he wouldn't forgive them.

"The only way we can work it out is if you finally accept Eddie. You missed a big part of my life when my boys and daughter was born your grandchildren. I have my own family now and won't turn my back on them." Jamie spoke in a clear firm voice one Danny never heard his brother use, especially to their father.

Even Frank was taken back by the tone Jamie used, having to stand quiet for a minute until the shock passed. He finally found his voice to speak again, "I know son and I regret that we couldn't share that moment with you. I've always accepted Eddie just not the nature of your relationship with her."

Jamie gave a shake of his head disappointed in the man he'd looked up for years. "Once grandpa wakes up we'll leave," Jamie said shortly. He let go of Henry's hand to stand up having to leave and control his anger.

Stepping out into the waiting room Jackson greeted his father first with a tight hug, followed by Zach and Alex. With tear strung eyes Jamie wrapped his arms around them into a tight hug letting go only to give Eddie one.

"Not going well in there," she guessed quietly seeing the aching hurt in his eyes.

Jamie shook his head then gave a deep sigh. "Are you tired babe? I can drop you and the kids off home and come back. I want to be here when my grandpa wake up."

"We're fine we can always get a hotel room, go see your grandpa. Jamie.. I'm sorry about your dad." Eddie quickly kissed him showing her support and understanding how it felt to be betrayed by someone you trusted most in the world.

"I love you Eddie," Jamie told her with a smile, glassy returning the kiss.

"I know."

Jamie turned back into the room past his father and brother right to Henry's said giving neither of them a glance. He only hoped his grandfather would wake up soon.


	11. Chapter 11

Jamie stayed by his grandfather's side the entire time leaving only to use the bathroom and get food and coffee. He barely spoke when Frank addressed him answering only his brother.

Henry lay still in bed looking small hooked up to machines checking his health. He remained that way until eight the following morning waking up with a slow fluttering of his eyes to focus the room.

Jamie had his head against the bed resting as they waited, lifting it when he heard a groan coming from the bed. "Pops?"

Henry blinked several times croaking still weary from being sick. "Jamie, took you long enough to come back."

Laughing in relief to see his beloved grandfather awake Jamie gave his hand a squeeze. "How do you feel pops? "

"Sick," Henry wheezed, a clear whistling sounding from his chest.

Sighing with worry Jamie sat with him wordlessly while Frank and Danny took their turn. "Are you two made up now or do we need to drill through those stubborn heads of yours," Henry questioned looking between Frank and Jamie.

When neither answered Henry shook his head in disappointment. "Listen you two are thicker then concrete. Francis, we missed an important part of Jamie's life because you don't agree with the nature of his relationship?"

"I can't pop not because I didn't want to but because I can't. He knew the consequences and if I don't show the same consideration as the 35,000 other officers.. " Frank trailed off watching Jamie stand up.

"Sorry pops I'll come back to visit later okay," Jamie asked rubbing his shoulder. He looked up at Frank giving a shake of his head. "You know all these years we've swallowed your not showing us favoritism but this is personal. I used to be proud to wear the last name Reagan not anymore." Jamie pulled his arm away from Danny's attempted grab walking out.

Jamie started right to the waiting room taking the twins hands while meeting Eddie's eyes, his own twinkling a hint of deep regret. "Ready to go?"

"Don't you want to stay with your grandfather," Eddie asked curiously confused why all of a sudden he was so eager to leave. She had a feeling something happened in the room between his family.

"No I just want to go Eddie we can get a hotel so I can come back." Before she could answer Jamie took the twins with him towards the lot followed slowly by Eddie rocking Beth.

While driving Jamie booked a hotel room for them only a short driving distance from the hospital. They stopped at the front desk to sign in before taking the kids upstairs neither Jamie nor Eddie saying much.

Eddie got the kids settled allowing Jamie to retrieve their bags from the car carrying them up. All three kids sat together on one bed turning their attention to the tv playing a random cartoon.

Taking a seat on the bed behind his wife Jamie pulled her against his chest letting his hands work her arms feeling the tenseness. Giving one more deep knead Jamie moved his hands up stopping at her shoulders simultaneously leaning in to kiss her neck. "Your so tense close your eyes," he whispered in her ear massaging her shoulders.

The feel of his strong hands against her made Eddie melt against him immediately relaxing with soft breaths closing her eyes. Jamie smiled at this, continuing to work all the tiredness out of her going to her back next.

Jamie reached around again for her legs seeing the tiredness when he came out of his grandfather's hospital room raising the kids and a baby taking a toll on her. He just started her lower back feeling her body laying against him breathing softly fast asleep.

Smiling softly, Jamie shifted Eddie so she lay across his lap with his arms wrapped tightly around her. With the kids attention turned away Jamie took time admiring her, gently brushing a hand down her arm and kissed her softly holding his Eddie while she slept.

The kids fell asleep shortly after using each other as pillows similar to how Jamie used to fall asleep on his older siblings as a kid.

With everyone asleep the room buzzed with a welcomed silence allowing Jamie to think without being interrupted. He watched Eddie sleeping for several minutes then checked on his boys smiling. In his sleep Jackson wrapped an arm around his little brothers.

This got Jamie thinking about his own family missing out on being part of their lives. He sighed fishing out his cell careful not to wake Eddie.

Cradling Eddie on his lap Jamie scrolled down to d and started typing a message to his older brother. I know you have work tomorrow but I'd like for you and pops to meet my boys. I appreciate your accepting Eddie and my relationship. You were a pain in the ass but you always had my back and that means the world to me.

Jamie sent the message waiting not even five minutes before his phone vibrated with a reply. Family first kid always got your back. Will be there.

Smiling Jamie tucked his phone away closing his eyes to try and sleep excited for the first time to reunite with his family.


	12. Chapter 12

The following morning Jamie woke early ordering breakfast for them while he showered, taking the food in when a knock tapped the door.

Quietly so he didn't wake Beth Jamie gently shook his boys awake so they could eat before heading back to the hospital. While they ate Jamie explained their plans for the day. "We're going back to see great grandpa and your uncle Danny wants to meet you too."

"Whose going to stay with mommy and Beth ," Jackson question looking over at the bed bothered they were forgetting them

"Mommy is staying with Beth and when she's ready I'll pick them up so they can come too," Jamie explained with a smile.

Jackson thought it over for a minute before turning his face seriously. "I'll stay with mommy and Beth I'm the big brother."

Alex finished pouring his milk careful not to make a mess then looked up at his dad. "Uncle?"

"Yea, Uncle Danny is my big brother so it's okay he's family," Jamie assured seeing the hesitation and nervousness in his son's eyes.

Jamie finished getting ready going to Eddie shaking her awake gently. "Hey babe I'm taking the twins to the hospital so you and Beth can rest, Jackson is right here he insists on staying with you. There's breakfast on the table for you when your ready, love you."

He leaned down for a kiss while gently caressing her cheek before looking back at his boys. They both dressed in black pants and a short sleeve button down shirt.

Taking his boys hands Jamie lead them to the car driving back around to the hospital for a mini reunion.

As they grew closer to the room Alex began clinging to his father's leg holding on tightly. "It's okay buddy I'm right here," Jamie soothed lifting his son into his arms. Zach on the other hand walked in shoulders back full of confidence very much like his uncle Danny.

Henry sat up in bed giving a broad smile seeing Jamie and the boys walking in. "Hey there," he exclaimed wheezing slightly.

Jamie walked the boys over lifting Zach so he sat next to his great grandfather smiling as the two hugged. "And whose this handsome little boy," Henry looked up at Alex trying to engage him but Alex was having none of it.

"He's really shy," Jamie explained rubbing the boy's back gently. Henry chuckled reminding him of how Jamie was a kid going only to his mother.

Henry turned to Zach asking questions looking up at Alex checking tI see if he was ready. Jamie was about to ask where Danny was after promising to be there when Danny strolled in grinning from ear to ear.

"Hey kid," he greeted arms outstretched enveloping his brother and nephew in a tight hug.

"Hey Danny thanks for doing this I really want them to know you guys. This is Alex and Zach's on the bed with pop, this one is shy " Danny smiled at Alex first receiving a head turn response and Alex buried his head against Jamie's shoulder.

Shrugging his shoulders Danny turned to Zach raising a hand for a high five smiling. "How old are you buddy?"

Zach raised a hand showing two little fingers. "You're two wow your such a big boy. What about your brother how old is he," Danny asked.

"Two," Zach answered quickly.

"Wow your both big boys. You know I'm your daddy's brother."

Zach nodded fully aware from the conversation over breakfast. "Uncle," he stated as almost a question making sure he got it right.

"Yea that's right your uncle. He's smart kid just like his uncle," Danny grinned receiving a mocking laugh from Jamie. "Yea okay Danny."

Henry shifted to sit upright feeling like old times with at least two of his grandkids present. "Wheres Eddie and your other kids?"

"They're coming later Eddie needed to rest she's exhausted after having Charlotte less than a month ago." Jamie slowly let Alex down to rest his arms sighing when his son turned and hugged his leg.

Danny turned his attention back to his nephews wanting to know them better, glorying it off with Zach immediately.

Around four Jamie fished for his ringing phone checking the caller ID and answered seeing it was Eddie. "Hey babe how are you feeling?"

"A little tired but not bad. Is it a good time for us to come ?"

"Sure I'll come pick you up Danny can watch the boys." Jamie ended the call realizing Danny and Henry were watching him.

"Go ahead kids I got these guys," Danny assured before Jamie could even ask. Jamie unwrapped Alex from around his leg and kissed his head. "I'm going to get mommy I'll be right back," he promised rushing out. Alex plopped on the floor watching his father leave with a scrunched face finally bursting into tears.

Jamie managed to pick Eddie, Jackson and Beth up and make it back to the hotel in exactly a half hour. As the elevator doors opened they could hear Alex crying from dorm the hall. Jackson marched ahead needing to see why his brother was upset.

He was greeted by two new faces Frank and Erin who stopped by to visit. Jamie rounded the corner behind him arm wrapped around Eddie, his face turning grim seeing his father walking in time to hear Erin complaining about Alex.

"I know that's not how Jamie would raise his kids he'd make sure they have respect. This one must take after his mother stuck up and spoiled so he doesn't have to say hi."

Eddie let her arm drop off Jamie running out towards the waiting area before anyone had a chance to say anything. Jackson quickly followed but not before giving his aunt an angry look.

"How dare you Erin you don't talk about my wife like that. Eddie is a wonderful mother and wife." Jamie lifted Alex off the floor then grabbed Zach's hand and stormed out after his wife.

Erin stared curious why Jamie was getting so upset after it was his kid who refused to say anything when they entered the room.

"You know Erin you need to think before you open your big mouth. The kid never met us and he's shy as it is of course he won't say hi yet. What you just said about Eddie was uncalled for especially when your daughter goes around acting like she's on a high horse."

Erin turned to him placing her hands on her hips with a narrow eyed glare. "Excuse me, my daughter shows respect when an adult walks into the room and says hi to them."

"Yea but she also runs her mouth a lot with comments and an attitude that she's always right. Wonder who she got that from mom. Jamie is finally starting to come around and the last thing we need is for you to push him away with your self righteous attitude," Danny returned, getting up to find his brother and Eddie hoping they didn't leave.

Henry raised an eyebrow at his only grand daughter giving a slight nod in agreement. "You were out of line Erin."

Danny easily found Jamie and Eddie sitting in a waiting room with the kids around her. Even though Eddie had her head on Jamie's shoulder Danny could see her small frame shaking with muffled cries.

"Hey I'm really sorry about Erin she had no right to say that,and I told her off for you," Danny approached a soft expression on his face. He knew if someone said that about Linda or his boys Danny would flip on them.

Jamie wrapped his arms around Eddie trying to comfort her while angry and hurt his own sister would say something about his wife and son. "We're going home Danny, apparently it was a mistake to come back."

"Wait at least tell grandpa your going okay? I won't try and stop you I know if that was me I your position I'd blow a gasket." Danny sighed not ready to see his brother go know that if he left like this they'd probably never see him again.

Giving Eddie a quick glance Jamie sighed nodding in agreement. Keeping an arm around Eddie, Jamie led them back to his grandfather's room stopping just inside. Erin and Frank were gone leaving only Henry and Danny.

"Cmere Eddie," Henry whispered softly hating to see her cry. When Eddie approached the bed holding Charlotte Henry reached out to pat her cheek. "I'm really sorry about Erin but it's an honor to have you as part of our family and I'd love to see you again."

Jamie stepped forward looping an around Eddie shaking his head that his request wasn't possible. "Sorry pops I really am but I won't have my family put through that. Love you pops."

With a quick turn to avoid seeing the sadness in his grandfather's eyes Jamie dropped his hand off Eddie and pulled Danny close. "Sorry Danny take care of him okay and Linda and the boys."

Danny swallowed hard blinking to push back tears starting to form. "I will you take care of your family okay kid? I'm proud of you just once in awhile let me your okay," Danny asked yelling back.

The older brother watched with a sad expression as his only remaining brother walked out probably for good.


	13. Chapter 13

After the fight Jamie made good on his promise not calling any of his family members still angry at his father and sister for what they said. He spent his time taking care of his family especially with Eddie still recovering.

A month and a half later Jamie kissed Eddie on the cheek when he entered the kitchen. "Hey beautiful," he greeted slipping his arms around her waist going in for a second kiss.

"Hey lamb chop," Eddie yawned tiredly not sleeping well the past month after what happened at the hospital. She often woke up cradling closer to Jamie needing to feel he was still next to her, wanting reassurance.

Jamie planted another kiss on her cheek gong around to take the plate out of her hand. "Go back to bed babe I can drive Jackson to school and the boys to day care so you can rest. I'm going into Brooklyn for a bit going to meet Renzulli for lunch he has to give me something but my cell is on and I'll be back no later than 3."

Too tired to argue, Eddie handed him the plate turning to lay a passionate kiss on his lips walking past him upstairs to try and rest while the house was quiet. Jamie grabbed something quick to eat, driving the boys to their respective schools before taking Belt back into Brooklyn.

He pulled off the road in Fort Greene their agreed upon meeting area parking in the first spot he found as parking was near impossible down there. Making sure his car was locked, Jamie shoved his hands in his pocket starting towards the small café giving it a quick scan finding his Sergeant on a stool.

"Hey," Jamie greeted not sure how to address him as he was no longer part of the squad but still needing to show respect after all Renzulli did for you.

"Hey good to see you kid have a seat must be like dejavou coming back here," Renzulli paused watching Jamie's face frown in confusion when he didn't recall the café.

Giving the young man a teasing laugh Renzulli helped him out. "Geez it wasn't that long ago that we were here sipping coffee on your first day on the job."

Jamie's blue eyes widened finally remembering standing by the bar while Renzulli finished his coffee eager to get back on patrol. They had talked about Joe and Danny that day, when

Sergeant let Jamie know he was Joe's training officer too, before getting his very first call.

"Yeah thought it'd be nice to come back here again, seemed appropriate. Man it seems like just yesterday you were just a rookie and man were you new." Renzulli said softly reaching into his pocket for the reason he brought Jamie out not that Jamie would complain about seeing his old training officer.

"I wasn't that bad Sergeant just eager," Jamie laughed, watching his friend place a small cross inside a clear package.

On the counter Renzulli lay a clear package containing a small gold cross with a blessing written on top in Italian. "It's a cross specially blessed right from Italy for Beth, I know I missed your boys' births but I thought I'd make it up a little. I miss seeing your ugly mug around the precinct kid but I know your boys and little girl will love you. Make sure you take good care of them okay, don't forget everything I taught you."

Jamie smiled overwhelmed by his friend's generosity but couldn't help take a small jab at him. "I know Sergeant get her a snow globe." His little taunt precipitated a small shake of his head from Renzulli laughing as he signaled the waiter to order with a soft mumble, "smartass."

"Thanks Sergeant this really means a lot to me and it will to Eddie too," Jamie assured him.

Jamie carefully slipped the cross in his front shirt pocket changing the conversation to a less serious topic over sandwiches. "Do you hear from your family," Renzulli questioned.

"No well I saw them a month and a half ago when my grandfather was in the hospital but after that no, it's complicated." Jamie's tone told Renzulli he wanted to drop it so Renzulli changed the subject once again to what he's been missing in the squad since leaving.

Before they parted he turned back giving his old friend a tight hug whispering, "Thank you Sergeant for everything."

"Hey I know you didn't end well with the NYPD but keep in touch okay I'd like to know how you guys are doing," Renzulli offered a small smile patting Jamie's cheek.

"I will, we should make plans to meet up once Eddie is feeling better, may be you and your wife can come out to Long Island and have dinner by us. I'm sure Eddie would love to catch up and you can meet our kids. " Jamie promised.

Renzulli gave one head nod sounding good to him, promising to keep in touch so they can make plans. He always saw something in them that they didn't, a special relationship they had beyond being just partners that they both hid for years until they finally realized.

Jamie started out watching his friend head towards his car, turning left down the block, heading back to his car still smiling as he fished his phone out to check in on Eddie.

He barely turned the corner when black smoke caught his attention from down the block with screams for help. Jamie took off towards the chaos stopping to find thick, black smoke pouring out of a second story window.

"Is there anyone else in there," he asked one of the tenants who just came out.

"Yeah there's a couple upstairs on the second floor third door to the left , I didn't see them come out yet," he wheezed from inhaling smoke.

Jamie looked up at the building turning for half a second to order, "Call 9-1-1 okay now and move back in case it blows." Without hesitation he dashed into the building disappearing amid black smoke and hot flames.


	14. Chapter 14

Frank headed down to the burning house where his estranged son had run inside. Meanwhile, Jamie held the nine month old baby in his arms. He had searched for her parents but he acrid smoke and intense heat were getting to the both. Jamie had the girl buried inside of his shirt, he had no choice but to leave.

Jamie stumbled out of the building, gagging on the smoke, barely able to breath. The baby was screaming inside his shirt, still able to draw breath. "Call my wife," Jamie gasped. "Call my Eddie." With those words he stumbled into the waiting arms of Renzulli.

Two medics extracted the screaming baby from his arms bringing her to an awaiting ambulance while a second pair pushed an oxygen mask over Jamie's mouth. To weak Jamie lay back closing his eyes and let out several gagging coughs.

"Where are you taking him," Frank questioned the medics while they loaded Jamie in the back.

"St Benjamins," the senior medic answered closing the doors allowing them to speed off. Frank took his phone out dialing Danny's number rushing around fire fighters and police officers both working hard.

Two fire fighters quickly carried a still man out followed by his wife the little girl's parents, laying them on the ground. "They're gone," one announced sighing.

"Danny get to St Benjamins Jamie was taken there I'll explain when I arrive." Not waiting for an answer Frank ended the call getting back into his detail ordering they drive to St Benjamins hospital praying for Jamie's health.

On the way Frank called Eddie always hating having to make these calls. "Eddie, this is Frank.."

"Commissioner what can I do for you? I'm kind of in the middle of something," Eddie said balancing the phone between her cheek and shoulder.

"It's Jamie, he was transported to St Benjamins hospital after running into a burning building to save a family." Eddie felt her heart stop frozen in shock and fear for the fear of her Jamie. Without saying goodbye Eddie hung up, taking Charlotte from her crib and called a cab to first pick up the boys before heading into Brooklyn.

By the time Frank arrived Danny already stopped four doctors to find out his brother's condition receiving the same answer that they'd let him know which irritated Danny more.

"Erin went to pick pops up and is on her way as is Eddie," frank almost sighed.

"When I know he's okay I'm going to kill him for this super hero crap and scaring us," Danny growled under his breath. Frank burrowed his mustache staying quiet worrying even though Jamie was estranged that was still his boy.

Erin arrived shortly after with Henry in tow barely getting in the room before the doctor walked out, "Reagan?"

Frank stepped forward first worry twinkling in his blue eyes as he attempted to read the doctor's face. "How is he?"

"Other than smoke inhalation and some minor bruises he'll be okay. We're keeping him on oxygen to clear his lungs but you can see him," the doctor assured a smile on his face.

A collective breath breathed out in relief Jamie will be okay following the doctor tmuntil they reached the hospital room. Jamie lay with his eyes closed resting with an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose helping him breath.

Danny quickly approached the bed taking his brother's hand breathing in unevenly seeing how hurt his baby brother was. "Hey kid, doctor said you'll be okay."

Jamie eyes fluttered open slowly turning towards his brother letting out a hacking cough that forced him to remove the mask momentarily to spit into a trash can left next to the bed. He laid back again giving Danny a smile. "No heroics huh?"

"Yea I'm gonna kick your ass when you feel better, what were you thinking Jamie?"

Jamie returned with another series of coughs before able to answer. "They said people were inside had to try. Did they find the parents? Is the baby okay?"

Danny smiled already aware of his brother's big heart. "I'm sorry son the parents were pulled out right before I left doa, there was nothing you could do," Frank shook his head slowly.

"I should have looked longer, they might have had a chance," Jamie replaced the mask feeling another attack coming and squeezed his eyes shut.

"No kid you did everything you could have, you saved the baby. You did good kid," Danny assured patting his shoulder proud despite the personal risk to Jamie's own life.

Jamie looked up meeting his brother's eyes his own teary from the smoke. "Eddie? Wheres Eddie?"

Ignoring the sarcastic huff from Erin, which didn't go unnoticed by Henry who gave her a sideways warning look. "Relax kid shes on her way okay," Danny assured trying to keep him calm.

As if on cue Eddie rounded the corner rushing intI the room breathlessly not sure what to expect. When she saw Jamie sitting up Eddie dropped the twins hands still holding Charlotte in a sling to rush to her Jamie.

"Jamie, are you okay lambchop," Eddie asked softly brushing a hand over his cheek looking at Danny wide eyed. "What did the doctor say?"

"He has smoke inhalation but will be okay apparently Jamie thought he was a smoke eater and rushed to help get a couple and their baby out," Danny assured softly not going into details about the rescue.

Frank moved closer towards the bed speaking up, "he was able to save the baby."

Eddie spun around narrowing her eyes at him then Erin. "This is a family matter and you are not so leave before I have you tossed out, your not welcome here."

Frank raised an eyebrow at the spunky blond clearly forgetting who he was. "You seemed to have your lost memory Miss Janko I am his father.." His voice trailed as Eddie interrupted mid-sentence.

"No, you have when you told Jamie to choose between our family and yours. You can't accept us get out! Now!"

With a surprised look Frank mumbled under his breath following Erin out.


	15. Chapter 15

With Frank and Erin gone Eddie turned her attention back to Jamie fussing over him. "Daddy?" Alex spoke up leaning on the bed for a better view.

Danny lifted his nephew onto the bed so he could sit with his father. Jamie smiled moving his arm around his son assuring him everything was key okay.

A doctor cleared his throat as he entered the room cradling the little girl Jamie saved. "Sorry to interrupt but I have a little girl who wants to thank you," the doctor smiled, bringing the baby over waiting until Jamie pushed himself up to place the baby in his arms.

Jamie smiled down at the little girl who looked up into his eyes with big brown eyes that made Jamie melt. She giggled, while kicking her legs showing she was okay.

"Whats going to happen to her," Jamie asked softly unable to take his eyes off her. "She'll be placed in foster care until someone comes for her which takes two years," the doctor sighed at the bubbly infant wishing for a different choice.

Frowning at the only option available for this beautiful little girl tickling her stomach sending the little girl into a chorus of giggles. Eddie's eyes twinkle watching her husband holding the baby who'd grow up without parents but would in fact grow up thanks to Jamie.

The doctor gave Jamie tine to bond before reaching in to take her outside where social services waited. Jamie hesitated not ready to let go yet, startled when the baby started to cry too apparently not wanting to go anywhere.

"I'm sorry but I have to take her," the doctor told him gently.

Jamie sighed seeing his time was up gave the baby one last gentle hug. "Good luck baby girl I hope to see you again someday in a better way though." He slowly reached up allowing the doctor to take her.

Eddie caught the sad look in Jamie's eyes as he passed the baby back to the awaiting doctor guilty he didn't do enough to save her parents too, forcing her into some strange situation. She let out a sigh as the baby's eyes swept up to Eddie cooing at her unaware of what was going on.

The doctor took no more than two steps from the bed when Eddie spoke up, "Wait."

Both Jamie and the doctor looked her over curiously wondering why she asked him to wait. Eddie turned to Jamie taking his hand her eyes reflecting a soft twinkle. "Why don't we adapt her Jamie?"

"Really, you're tired as it is with the kids.." Jamie trailed off even though his heart begged him to agree, he didn't want to put any added stress of an already exhausted Eddie.

"I know but I feel like this is the right thing to do," Eddie insisted with a gentle squeeze of his hand. The baby was only a few months older then their Beth and would fare better in a family who already had kids.

Jamie smiled proud to call Eddie his wife finally giving his final nod looking back at the doctor. "Tell them we'll be taking her home with us.."

"This is admirable Mr. Reagan, Mrs. Reagan,' the doctor said. "But the social worker will have to get your emergency approval to take this child home, I will have the nurse call her and for the time being I will keep her in the hospital so that we can avoid bouncing her from house to house."

Eddie smiled and placed Beth on the bed with Jamie so she could hold her newest daughter, the baby looked at Eddie and grabbed her nose. "Poor little thing, you have no idea what's happened to you, do you?"

In response the baby smiled up at her kicking her little legs unaware of what was going on around her.

Jamie smiled at his Beth then over to his three boys laying back to rest surrounded by his family. He lay his head back to rest itching for doctors to release him so he could go home with his family.

Doctors released him three days later to monitor his breathing also releasing their baby CeCe to their car. A nurse brought her in when they were ready to leave, smiling when the baby began fussing in her arms reaching out to Jamie.

"Wow that was fast she must sense something in you," the nurse commented handing CeCe over. Jamie simply smiled at her rocking CeCe in his arms slowly and followed Eddie out holding Beth.

They put the girls in the back car seats having to buy another for CeCe. Jamie coughed getting into the front driver's seat heading home. "Thanks for this, wanting to take CeCe home."

"I wouldn't have it any other way Jamie, I couldn't be happier with our little family." Eddie smiled but inside was frowning, wishing one of their family was around to see the kids grow up, to have grandparents who spoil them.

"What are we going to do, we can't keep paying for daycare for the boys, Jackson's tuition now the two girls?" Jamie checked the girls from the rear view mirror, smiling seeing them fast asleep.

Eddie sighed not sure how to answer him only staring out the window.

Once home they put the girls down for a nap meeting on the living room couch. "We're comfortable but we could use the extra money. I could ask for more hours and take the Detective test. We could both take it and see what happens but one of us may have to stay home," Jamie suggested softly hugging Eddie.

"And it'll be me who stays home right, cause I'm the woman," Eddie accused turning to glare at him.

"I didn't say that Eddie, let's both take the test and go from there. If we both pass we can see about keeping the boys in day care or if one of us has to stay home okay, that doesn't have to be decided now." Jamie sighed quietly holding her thinking.

"Yes, Jamie," Eddie replied. "It does honey we have to think of our kids. First thing, wea should try to get child support for Jackson. Sydney is his birth mother, she should have some responsibility for him."

"I don't know Eddie," Jamie sighed. "If one of us stays home, we can save a lot of money. Maybe you can start off with a leave while Beth is still young, then when we're done having kids, I'll take a leave and you can go back to work, maybe take the Sergeant test and you the Detective."

Jamie sighed hugging her against her deep in thought. He wasn't even off probation and things were changing quickly.


	16. Chapter 16

Jamie watched Eddie nursing their baby girl. "Maybe we can wean her? That will give you more energy?"

"Yes but it's not good for her, she needs mother's milk for a year or she'll be sick. I can do it, I just need help, I need you to help me more."

Those words were still on Jamie's mind when he fell asleep. He was still on probation, they had five children...and his wife was often very tired, too tired to cope. It wasn't fair, but Cece was such a precious child. Jamie fell asleep thinking of these problems, when he woke up again a half hour later he felt like he could not draw a breath. He put his hand on his chest, gasping for air. "Eddie..." He hoped she could hear him.

When she didn't answer Jamie reached over to shake her, calling her name again. "Eddie."

This time Eddie heard, she sat up and rubbed her eyes tiredly. "What's wrong Jamie, hey breath."

Jamie leaned over holding his chest while taking deep breaths panicking. "Eddie, I can't breath I don't know what to do we have five kids and all this, Eddie I'm not even off probation yet."

"Hey, we'll be okay just breath okay we'll figure it out somehow just breath. "Eddie placed a hand on his back fully awake now with worry. She wasn't sure if they'd be okay but had to calm him down somehow.

"Eddie, we cant..a rookie officer makes close to nothing and the department can fire me at any time. We need to figure it out before that happens," Jamie ranted in one breath. Eddie sighed cupping his cheeks in her hand to stop him.

He looked at her eyes wide nervous with uncertainty on their future breathing in deep. "I told the captain I want to take the Detective test. We like it here but for its to much we'll find a smaller house until we make more. Jamie between the two of us we'll be okay," Eddie insisted speaking softly.

Jamie held his chest starting to feel slightly better talking to Eddie. The pay in Long Island was higher than New York but taxes were higher evening the scale. He didn't want to go back with the NYPD but wouldn't count that option out either.

Several deep breaths later Jamie pulled Eddie against him thankful for her calming him down. "We'll be okay Jamie, I know we will." Eddie smiled at him hoping she was right. They settled in again falling asleep.

The next morning CeCe woke them up with a long wail letting them know she was ready to get up. Jamie sighed fighting the exhaustion to retrieve their newest daughter. When he entered the room both CeCe and Beth standing in their cribs.

"Hey baby girls," Jamie couldn't help but smile at his two little princesses' bright eyes watching him as he crossed the room. Jamie picked up CeCe first placing a kiss on her head as he brought her to the table for a diaper change.

Once CeCe was dry Jamie placed her on the floor doing the same for Beth. With both girls dry he carried them downstairs joined shortly by the boys.

"Hey guys what do you want for breakfast?" Jackson held his brother's hands helping them into their chairs.

"Cereal please, daddy can we go to the park today," Alex asked while Jamie brought cereal over. Jamie ruffled his boy's hair with a smile going back to feeding the girls. "Yea sure buddy that sounds good. "

All the kids settled Jamie finished feeding the girls he sent the kids upstairs to change while he brought food to Eddie. Eddie lay in bed fast asleep exhausted stirring when Jamie sat down beside her. "Hey Eddie, I made breakfast for you. The boys want to go play in the park."

"Hmm that sounds nice, where are the girls," Eddie asked softly slowly waking up.

"Jackaon's watching them for a minute, I can change them and let you relax today. We won't be long at the park I know the girls have to eat soon " Jamie gently brushed Eddie's bling hair back smiling.

Eddie lay on her back looking up at him with a smile. "Thanks Jamie."

He leaned down kissing her softly, then stood up getting the girls ready. Alex and Zach held a soccer ball waiting in the foyer with Jackson talking eagerly. It wasn't often Jamie had a day off that he had enough energy to take them out so today was special for them.

Jamie strapped the girls in their stroller, leading his kids to the park. He was also excited about getting to spend time with them. He found a spot under a tree to park the stroller where he could see the boys playing.

Alex put the ball down kicking a straight line pass to his brother smiling. Zach stopped the ball passing to Jackson warming up.

Jamie watched in awe at his two youngest started a game, showing skills he didn't realize they had. Smiling he turned to the girls tickling their stomachs to keep them occupied. CeCe giggled squirming out of her seat wanting to get out.

Jamie unlocked her lifting her out smiling while placing a kiss on her head. "Beth you want out," Jamie asked taking her out too. He sat with the girls on his lap watching his boys smiling enjoying time with his kids.

His cell phone vibrated in his pocket causing Jamie to groan seeing the precinct number on his ID. "Reagan," he answered.

"Reagan, Captain Daniels we need you to come in some guys called out sick today."

Jamie watched his kids with a sigh, needing the day off with them to give Eddie time to rest. "It's my day off Captain, I'm out with my kids sorry."

"I understand rookie but we need bodies so you need to come in forthwith, that's an order kid," the captain grumbled that a rookie dare talked back to him.

"Sorry Captain not today." Despite the consequences he'd be facing Jamie ended the call so he could spend the day with his kids. Jamie knew he'd face departmental charges for disobeying orders but right now that was the least of his worries.


	17. Chapter 17

When Eddie gathered enough energy to shower she took her time using strawberry shampoo, Jamie's favorite. She finished headed downstairs in time to catch Jamie bringing their kids in all looking tired from playing outdoors.

"Hey, how was the park?" Eddie scanned the faces of her boys smiling at their bright eyes. "It was great, we played soccer and went on the playground. Eddie listened to her oldest boy but her gaze remained with her tired looking husband.

"Maybe you can show mom out in the back? We'll be right there okay?" Jamie rubbed his boy's heads as they passed knowing that meant their parents wanted to talk about something they weren't supposed to hear.

The couple waited until their kids were out of ear shot to meet eye gaze. "Did you get a call from the Sergeant?" The look in Jamie's blue eyes told her that he had and the conversation didn't go well.

"What do you think will happen Jamie? We need to keep this job." Jamie walked around the carriage to hug his wife not sure how to answer her. He knew not following command would lead to bad things

"I know babe, we'll figure it out okay I promise. Right now go outside and play with the kids I'll be right out, just going to change our girls," Jamie gently kissed her trying to reassure her no matter what happened they'd work it out.

Jamie took his girls out of the carriage to their room setting Beth down on the floor while he changed CeCe kissing her head before switching. He put Beth beside her sister so he could clean up the table.

After throwing out the dirty materials Jamie turned to his girls in time to see CeCe trying to pull herself up into a standing position. "Wow CeCe you got it," Jamie encouraged watching proudly as she managed to get to her feet, lifting her up and placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Good girl," Jamie rewarded her proud of her receiving a raspberry back. Laughing Jamie lifted Beth kissing her too as she babbled away in his arms bringing them to the yard. "CeCe just pulled herself into a standing position," he announced setting them down.

"Really that's great baby," Eddie scooped CeCe up into her arms for a hug. Smiling Jamie went back inside to make lemon aide for them celebrating the milestone. Just as he stirred the pile of bills stacked on the counter caught his eye forcing Jamie to sigh.

Ignoring them for now at least he brought the pitcher and glasses out into the yard to enjoy time with his family. Jackson and Alex teamed up against Zach and Jamie for a game of soccer while Eddie played with her girls.

When the kids came back in for a nap and Jackson to have DEAR time Jamie wrapped an arm around Eddie sitting on the living room couch. "I was thinking of calling Danny asking him to get an application for the NYPD. We technically quit but maybe if he can talk with the commissioner just in case."

"Jamie, I think you should talk to him yourself but Danny and I can be there. I know you have tour tomorrow find out what the Sergeant says first then we'll work it out okay," Eddie intertwined their hands trying not to show she was worried.

Jamie couldn't help but smile grateful for his wife's support for his not following orders again. "I love you," Jamie whispered kissing her softly, caressing her cheek with his hand.

"I know," Eddie teased smiling at him returning the kiss.

The following morning Jamie showed early to work checking in with his boss. "Don't you ever disobey my order again Reagan. This isn't the NYPD led by your daddy, he can't help you here got it? I'm giving you a rip for insubordination and a five day suspension maybe you'll wise up."

Jamie swallowed the punishment biting his tongue, turning around to leave the office. He unlocked the car sitting in the driver's seat for several minutes thinking. Eddie wouldn't be expecting him for several hours giving Jamie time in between.

He turned the engine on pulling out towards Brooklyn, going North into upper Manhattan towards the 5-4 hoping his brother was working.

"Hey, look who came back, how's it going Jamie," Gornley greeted the younger Reagan surprised to see him back after hearing what happened with the family.

"Hey Lieutenant, how are you? Is my brother working today?" Jamie didn't mean to sound rude but he had limited time before having to head back to Long Island so Eddie didn't worry.

Gornley nodded pointing to the desk Danny worked seeing the older man busily looking through papers.

Jamie crossed the room stopping just in front of the desk smiling. "Hey Danny."

Danny looked up surprised to hear his brother's voice not expecting to see him back at the 5-4. "Hey kid what are you doing here? It's good to see you." Danny stood hugging his little brother happy to see him.

"I don't have much time Danny have to head back before Eddie worries but a lot's been going on. I know your working but do you have a few minutes?" Jamie quickly glanced at Gornley not wanting to get his brother in trouble.

"Don't worry about him kid cmon I'll take you to the box we can talk there." Danny led his brother wondering what was so important Jamie drove two hours just to speak with him.

Gornley watched the brothers make their way to the box for a private conversation wondering exactly the same thing.

Danny closed the door behind them turning to study his little brother surprised at how stressed his face looked. "What's going on kid, does Eddie know you came back here?" One look at Jamie's face told him Eddie had no idea Jamie returned to Brooklyn.

"No, and that's why I don't have long. I need a favor…" Jamie explained the situation ignoring Danny's knowing grin, amused his little brother was becoming more like him.

At the end Jamie took a deep breath allowing Danny to speak his mind. "I can't promise you anything but I'll do my best kid. Does anyone else know your back Erin or pops?"

Jamie shook his head that no one did forcing Danny to frown. "Okay, I can talk to pops and Erin but you, dad and Erin need to bury what happened in the past. Erin was out of line saying what she did and I told her so. She feels bad and so does dad. Let me talk to grandpa for anyone can get through to dad it's him, just hang in there okay?"

Jamie had never been more grateful for his brother then at that moment. Things weren't resolved just yet but knowing his brother was working on helping fix everything made Jamie feel a little better as he headed back to Long Island.


	18. Chapter 18

Danny waited until the next day after Frank left for work to have the conversation with his grandfather. "You know Jamie will never take charity so by him asking me means a lot. I know I give him a hard time but honestly I miss my kid brother. "

"This conversation should have happened a long time ago but they're both stubborn. Call Jamie have him come down with Eddie and the kids so we can end this ridiculousness. Oh and Danny don't tell your father, it'll be better if he's surprised serve him right." Danny smiled grateful for his grandfather's support in helping him bring Jamie back. He sent a quick text inviting Jamie down Saturday hoping they would be able to work it out.

The week flew by and before they knew Jamie and Eddie packed their five kids into the van heading towards Brooklyn. Eddie too was glad this was happening as the kids missed out on the family dynamics the Reagans took to heart.

After a two hour car ride Jamie parked outside his father's house with a feeling of uncertainty. In the back Jackson smiled sitting in between his brothers both of whom fell asleep on him. In the first row both girls too lay sleeping with their heads resting on each other.

"I'll bring the girls in first then come for Alex and Zach," Jamie whispered as he carefully took his girls out and carried them inside.

Hearing footsteps Frank frowned putting his paper down surprised to see Jamie in his house. Before Frank could get a word in Henry ushered over to take the girls so Jamie could get his boys. Jackson followed holding Eddie's hand anxiously while Jamie put his brother's down.

Both Henry and Jamie returned together leading them into the living room. Danny got up first greeting his brother and Eddie with hugs and an open hand for Jackson to high five. While the brother's reunited Frank's wandered to Erin who too remained still them Henry wondering who set this up.

Settling on the couch next to Jamie, Danny nodded about to start explaining but Henry cut him off. "Francis you and Jamie are going to end this ridiculous nonsense now."

"He's the one who walked away from the family not me. We could have worked it out," Frank argued eyes on his youngest estranged son.

"Enough this blame back and forth is ridiculous. Family always comes first so stop this nonsense and listen to each other understood?" Jamie and Frank exchanged smiles both nodding they understood but neither starting to talk.

As an additional support Eddie gave Jamie's hand a firm squeeze to start. Jamie sighed turning to his father not really sure what to say. "I'm going to be honest here dad I miss everyone an even though I'm hurt by what you and Erin said I want to come back. Danny and Pops are right this has gone on long enough."

"Does this have to do with your disobeying orders and suspension? I have friends in the police department and they've been filling me in on how you've been doing. The entire time you left Jamie I've been finding out how you are. I know about your financial troubles and if you thought for a second just because we were disagreeing that you couldn't come to me.." Frank sighed with a sad twinkle to his eyes.

"Jamie, I put you and Eddie on an extended leave of absence hoping you'd come back to the force but that expired.. "

"I'm sorry for what I said too Eddie, it was rude and not like me at all. You've made Jamie happy and for that I'm grateful," Erin admitted with a smile. Eddie nodded internalizing what Erin said but just wanting this over with.

Eddie nodded to her sister in law, turning to give Jamie a hard look that he needed to bury this once and for all.

"he walked away because of the ridiculous fight..now stand up and hug both of you and consider that an offer.." Henry watched the two study each other before sighing getting up to shake hands.

Henry sighed..they had a lot more work to repair the family..


End file.
